First off, I am in no way implying women should only be interested in men for money. That’s wack! I am, however, suggesting women might want to leave some men where they are until they have something of value and benefit to contribute to our lives beyond good sex. But by no means am I advocating for us to pass up a really good booty call either. If a woman chooses to engage with a man for the quality of his sexual gifts let her do so with conscious awareness and not with the intent to turn a penis into a husband.
I am elated to speak to this topic because people are weirded out behind conversations about sex let alone sex and money. Guess what, though? They go together! It’s time for a shift. The Goddess of love whether you call her Oshun, Het Heru or Venus rules love, beauty, and… yep, you guessed it, money! The negative connotations attributed to “gold digger” are long overdue for amendment. Women proudly proclaim independence while shunning the idea of a man’s assistance for any of their needs.
I get it. Actualized women do not depend on anyone to provide all needs and fulfill all desires. We are autonomous and self sufficient. However, let these women who fiercely boast independence take several seats and stop fucking things up for those of us who know the magic behind men contributing to our lives. We can be strongly independent and openly accepting to male assistance; they are not mutually exclusive.
While we cannot quantify the role of women, we can at least admit we are the muse of men. This reason alone makes us invaluable to their lives (in addition to obvious reasons like our feminine assets: Curves, breasts, Yoni). Those of us who know better stay cultivating our femininity with fierce beauty rituals always remembering that beauty, brains, and sexy is pure power, baby!
Women have been feared by men throughout history because the right lipstick worn by the right woman can make a man do things he had no idea he was capable of doing, simply.
The right woman positioned in the life of an ambitious man can be his entire reason for succeeding. Her devotion, the constant pouring into him with her words and brilliance, her unwavering faith and nurturing, good sex, touch, kisses and unconditional love are priceless! She is all the muse he needs to propel him into his greatest self. It’s the harmony that helps to sustain his ego and expand his heart.
The woman, whether by soft influence or sass and fire, the one who refuses to take any crap, the kind that can lead him to overcome his own demise, is the best gift of them all. There is no price. Her presence is invaluable and a man’s money is but a gesture, a symbol of his appreciation for her.
His money represents time and energy, an investment. It symbolizes his desire to pour into her, to make sure she is kept and always has what she desires. This serves him because she will always show up for him in ways he never even knew he needed. As the man in her life his job is to create heaven where she can sustain the magic she is always conjuring to be her best self, to look, smell, and taste good—all of the things he adores about her, the things that make him better. Certainly she can do it for herself but when he gives it, it is an offering to the altar that is she! He contributes to the process that allows her life to be her own. She is the embodiment of wisdom, his vision when he cannot see, his ears when he cannot hear. She reminds him to keep his heart open and pure.
I realize I am speaking to what some identify as a construct of masculinity and maleness, one that says men are protectors and providers at the service of humanity and her children. I agree with this construct. I agree that men are naturally much less in their hearts than women because of their inability to nurture life in their bodies and give birth. It just is what it is. There are always exceptions to the rule, but these are exceptions not the rule.
The material world is his playground and money is his tool. When he spends money he is invested, mind and attention, sometimes heart. This is not only true for men, it is true for us all at this point in time because as a society we value money over most anything else. People care about things they have to pay for because they care so much about their money. Energy flows where attention goes.
When we talk women, sex and money, we aren’t just talking sexual intercourse as sex. It’s much more than that, and is always happening. Sex is a ritual of giving and receiving. Money is energy and a form of currency so, we are speaking to time and resources, benefits and abundance or in other words, attributes of value. A wise woman who knows her value and worth will not give of her time and essence for free because in the end, and the beginning for that matter, she knows delusion serves no one—not her, her man, nor society. She’s upholding her royal status as co-creator in the circle of life daring to keep the natural order of humanity and nature. Men value what they work for and in what they invest. She vows to always be valued because the moment she isn’t all of life as we know it loses value. She can’t have that on her watch. Woman is nature and nature is life. This is why men must pay for the gift that is a woman’s nature.
Keniece Ford of Beautykween is an Women’s Spirituality and Feminine Wellness Consultant. Her work helps to guide women to the core of their spiritual power through sexual awareness. She has helped many women awaken to themselves and activate their feminine power through her event, The Activated Woman. An Activated Woman is a woman who walks in the world with an open and expansive heart, knows love is her guide and shield, is sexually liberated and confident, uses sex as a tool for healing and manifestation, is committed to actualizing, and knows her sexuality is one of her GREATEST utilities!